I've been really down lately over all
this divorce business. This morning was pretty bad because I had a
dream about him where I was lying on his chest and telling him that
I don't want to go, please don't let me go. Then to make things
weirder, Adrien woke up and started walking around looking for his
daddy. I told him daddy wasn't here and he argued with me that he had
seen him and then started crying.
So I held him as he sobbed and told me
how much he missed daddy. I think he must have been dreaming about
him too. At any rate, it made for a difficult morning.
I prayed about it some and I told God
that if there was any chance that my ex could change and be a bigger
man for me and his kids that I needed a big sign. I need my ex to
tell me that, without me asking. I'm just going to step back and let
the Lord decide what happens here. I'm tired of always taking matters
into my own hands, it never works out well in the end for me.
With all that said, I've got to get
back in the saddle with my writing. I've slacked a bit this week due
to the way I've been feeling. See, whenever I'm feeling bad I like to
take the kids out shopping and to do things with them – basically
anything to get me out of the house and my mind off of the bad stuff.
As a result, I haven't been working as hard as I should have been on
my career.
Today I'm finishing a lens that I've
been working on for a couple of days about fall sweaters then I think
I'll write a new one about B.B. cream (mainly because I just bought
some and LOVE it). Don't know what B.B. cream is? Well wait for my
lens and I'll tell you. Don't you dare Google it! Wait for me to fill
you in. ;)
The gist of this post is, even when
you're feeling like total crap and nothing seems to be going your
way, you've just got to keep on truckin'. Put on your big-girl pants and take care of business. It won't be like this for
long.
By the way, the video below is just because I'm really digging this song right now. So yeah.. enjoy.
By the way, the video below is just because I'm really digging this song right now. So yeah.. enjoy.
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