A Ton on My Mind

I didn't get much opportunity to work or even update my blog this past week because there's been a whirlwind of stuff going on here.

The first thing and probably the biggest distraction lately has been the house hunt. There are so many major decisions that have to be made in such a short amount of time that my head is spinning. I don't want to make the wrong decision and screw myself over in the long run, you know? It's hard.

I'm considering getting a double-wide trailer and letting my brother move in with me, to help out with the kids and also to help with the rent. My brother Adam lives in an RV right now, so he's very interested in moving in with me. The drawback to this is that Adam hasn't always been the most dependable person in the world.

Right now, he has a job and it's been working out well for him. However, he has a history of losing jobs. Should he lose his job, it would be hard for me to make ends meet. But if he does good, he would be a huge asset to have living with me. He really is good with the kids. I don't know. I've got too much to think about.

As far as work is concerned, I'm going to take some more time to improve my Zazzle store. The reason behind this is because when I added more products a couple of months back, I immediately doubled my earnings. I went from around $30/month to $67. It just seems like a better use of my time right now. I can't seem to make the time to focus on my writing. With Zazzle, I can work in bursts. I can throw up 50 new products in one weekend and reap the rewards of that forever. My time would have more monetary value with Zazzle I think.

Don't get me wrong. I'm still going to write Squidoo lenses as time permits, in the hopes that one day I'll have enough available time to be a "real writer." But for now I'm not a writer, I don't have time to be -- just like I don't have time to be an artist. I'll settle for t-shirt designer if it's the thing that's most likely to help pay the bills. I have the rest of my life to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. For now, it's more about what I need to be to get by.

I'm Back!

As it turns out, the reason I was feeling so terrible with this last cold was that is wasn't just a cold, it turned into pneumonia. So I went to the doctor and got some heavy antibiotics and was put on a nebulizer. I'm getting better and starting to feel back to normal again so I'm getting back into the swing of things.

On Friday I took Eva and Adrien to Ethan's school, The Children's Center, for their Fall Festival party. Ethan got to go to class dressed in his Halloween costume. He was a punk rocker this year. I went all out! I buzzed his hair into a real mohawk, dressed him in cool clothes, gave him those fake tattoo sleeves and punk bracelets. Everyone thought he looked awesome and a couple of people said he looked like a pint-sized Travis Barker. I forgot to take photos, but his teacher took some and I'm trying to see if she'll email them to me. All in all it was a hit and everyone had fun.

Today I'm getting back to work. I've got to write a few new lenses and do some more promo work. The last couple of lenses I put out were Fast and Easy Makeup for Busy Moms and How to Make Skin Lightening Cream at Home.

The house hunt is still going on. In fact, my parents are in Clanton right now looking at a four bedroom single wide trailer. Four bedrooms would rock! I sure hope everything works out and I can get it! My fingers are crossed that they have good news when they come home. ;)

That's it! I'm Ordering a Biohazard Suit...

I'm sick. I'm talking fever, chills, body aches, stuffy nose, hacking cough, so tired I could strangle anyone who threatens my rest like a grizzly bear kind of sick. Boo Boo's home from school today because he's coughing pretty bad too. Adrien's cough from last week is mysteriously coming back (reinfection?) and baby Eva's nose started running again today as well.

I can't handle germs anymore. I'm DONE! Every single school year we get on this never ending merry-go-round of sickness that lasts for months. I'm fed up with it. Do my kids and I have no immunity whatsoever? We take vitamins, drink juice, try to eat fruits and vegetables often. What gives?

After a few months of this I'll start losing my mind and psychotically cleaning everything because I'll be convinced the house is what's making us sick. I'm serious. I do it every year. The germs literally drive me to the point of insanity.

I'm not ready to go through this again. As much as I love fall and winter, spring just can't get here fast enough for me. I don't know when I'll be back to writing again. As of this moment, I'm on sick leave.

Today's Mission

Aside from doing the dishes and the laundry (which I've already gotten under control because I'm awesome) I've got some work to do on Squidoo today.

First, I'll be writing a new lens. I'm not sure what the topic will be, but I'll figure something out. Next I've got to spruce up a few of my other lenses that aren't really seeing much traffic. Then it's time to promote them all a little more on various social bookmarking sites and what not. And finally I'll open a Xomba account and start writing a few short articles that link back to my lenses.

Boo Boo and I are sick with colds, but thanks to some cold medicine we're feeling pretty decent for the time being. By the way, Boo Boo is Ethan. That's been his nickname ever since Adrien was a baby. And no, there's no relation to Honey Boo Boo. We may be Alabama hicks but we're classier than that. ;)

So that's the schedule for today. Wish me luck. I've got to run for now because Mr. Boo Boo is sitting at the dinning room table trying to let me know that he's ready for lunch. He might not be able to talk, but he knows how to get his point across!

My Blog Gets a Makeover & My Twitter Followers are Pervs

As you might have noticed, the blog is looking especially fabulous these days. That's because I spent the entire freaking day (no joke) hand drawing a new banner image. I did it with Photoshop and I think it's pretty awesome, if I may say so myself.

You may be thinking "well if you can draw digital art like that, then why aren't you selling it and making money that way?" Seems like a no-brainer doesn't it? Unfortunately, digital art takes an unholy amount of time and time is something I just don't have. Maybe one of these days I'll be an artist, but not today friend. Not today.

In other news, my twitter followers are perverts. Yesterday, I tweeted about my latest blog post saying something like "So this writing thing is not taking off yet. Maybe I'd do better as a stripper. Gotta bring home the bacon some how!" Yeah... the link I put at the end of that tweet got clicked like nobody's business.

The joke's on them though. Instead of nudie pics, all they got was a semi-depressing blog post about how I'm not doing well with my writing. Ha! Why didn't I think about using misleading tweets to gain traffic sooner?

In all honesty, it was supposed to be funny. I guess one of two things happened, either everyone really thought it was funny and that's why they clicked, or I have a really warped sense of humor and my joke ruined the day of people surfing the internet for naked chicks. Either way, I'm amused.

Fear and Doubt

I'm starting to get scared. It's getting real close to the day that my kids and I move out of my parents house. We've been looking at trailers and it's almost time to start making a decision on which one we're getting. Part of me is thrilled at the thought of having my own place again and no longer sleeping on a couch bed with my four year old, but I'm mostly terrified of how I'm going to make ends meet.

One life saver will be in the child support and temporary alimony I'll be getting. However, my husband wasn't a millionaire, so it certainly won't be enough to live off of.

I've made like 4 bucks with Squidoo. Don't spend it all in one place right? I'm getting worried that freelance writing isn't a viable option for me anymore. I just flat out don't have the time. You can't work only a couple of hours a day at freelance writing. It takes way more commitment than that. But a couple of hours a day, or sometimes less, is all I've got.

I can't get a mainstream job because then who would care for Ethan? The younger two would be fine in daycare if that's what had to be done, but not Ethan. I wish I could afford a nurse to care for him in the afternoons and during the summer time so I could just go to work and support my family like everyone else. It sure would be easier than trying like hell to find time to write articles online that may or may not ever help pay the bills. I'm really scared.

I think I'll be a phone sex operator. Now that's where the money is! I'm joking of course (or am I)? All I know is there's got to be a better way. I don't think writing is going to cut it for me right now. Maybe I should learn to make something and sell it on eBay. Who am I kidding? I can't sew or do anything that they teach in home-ec. I took wood shop in high school. Not to learn how to make stuff though, I took it for the boys. Needless to say I'm not crafty in the least.

Lord, give me a sign. Tell me how I'm supposed to financially support my family with virtually no means to do so? Sometimes it feels like all the paths in my life lead to a dead end. But I'm not giving up, I'm just a tad bit worn out. Perhaps I'll feel more optimistic in the morning.

Squidoo Wrap Up

You know how I said my biggest problem trying to make money with Squidoo is that I don't have time to write as many lenses as I need to? Well it's been a little over a month on Squidoo and I've only gotten 11 lenses so far. Ouch.

I had the bright idea to try to find some old eHow articles of mine to re-purpose into lenses. I was pretty sure they were saved on one of these old hard drives I have laying around. So I got out a USB to SATA/IDE cable to see what I could find. Unfortunately after much time spent screwing around with it, I couldn't get it to work. Fail.

So now I'm going to have to wait until I can get my hands on a desktop PC so I can just slave those old drives. Where I'm at now, there are only laptops and tablets. Oh well.

Anway, here are the 11 lenses I've got under my belt so far. I'm going to start work on a new one today about fast and easy makeup for busy moms. I came up with that idea while doing my own super-speedy makeup this morning. I thought "hey, I should write a lens about this." ;)

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